Practical Reasons For Waiting

Premarital sex can detract from a strong relationship and a fulfilling love life. Too often, it's merely a self- gratifying experience. After intercourse, one partner might be saying, " I love you " while the other is thinking, " I love it. "

Premarital sex often lacks total, permanent commitment. This can create insecurity. For instance, while the couple is unmarried, the magging thought can persist, " If she/he's slept with me, who else have they slept with? " After they marry, one might think, " If they were willing to break a standard with me before we married, will they with another after we marry? " Doubt can chip away at their relationship.

Premarital sex can also inhibit communication. each might wonder, " how so I compare with my lover's other partners? Does she/ he tell them how I perform in bed? " Each may become less open; communication can deteriorate and so can the relationship.

Premarital sex can lessen people's chances to experience maximum oneness and pleasure. " I really like what you said about waiting, " said a recently married young woman after a lecture at Sydney University in Australia. " My fiance and I had to make the decision, and we decided to wait. " 9 Each had been sexually active in other previous relationships ) " With all the other tensions, decisions and stress of engagement, sex would have been just another worry. Waiting till our marriage before we had sex was the best decision we ever made. "


And those who save sex for marriage are rewarded in two ways:

Honeymoon virginity. Virgins may be nervous on their wedding night. But that's good. You ought to be nervous for the biggest night of your life. For virgins, everything is about to change. They will delve into mysteries they have wondered about all their lives. They will unfold those mysteries with the person they love more than any other. That's worth celebrating. For the sexually experienced, however, a honeymoon is merely a nice vacation.

You only get one " first time " in life. There is great joy in experiencing it with the person to whom you've just publicly committed your life. But that's only possible if you wait.


Total commitment. When you're used to having sex without total commitment, it may be hard to understand what totally surrendering your life to another person is all about. If, earlier in your life, sex merely meant, " I'm strongly attracted to you, " it is not easy to change your thinking to, " I give myself wholly and exclusively to you."

Virgins are uniquely able to give their total selves to love in a marriage. That's why " the first time " is such a big deal. You are giving your total self to the one great love of your life.

It's not easy to resist the temptations and pressures to have sex before marriage. But if you want to experience sex the way God meant for it to be, the surest way is to experience no other kind of sex. It's tough to wait for, certainly. But most good thing are.